No, really. It’s just a simple question.
Or is it?
I tend to check myself when this question is asked, or even
implied - imposing a critical review of everything I’ve said or done in recent
history to warrant that kind of attention. I often feel like the question has become a means of telling
us we’ve stepped out of line, a way of intimidating us back into whatever collective
thinking rules the day, because it almost always has the strong undertones of How Dare You.
But I would like to take the judgment out of those words and
infuse them with something different.
I would like to ask the question as an invitation to consider all the
possibilities of you.
Who do you think you are?
And then.
Who would you like to be?
And then I would like to dare you… to be the person you
would most like to be.
In exchange, I will try to offer you my most authentic self. “Try” being the operative word, because
authenticity is naked and scary.
But it will be a little easier for both of us if we try it together. It
will require us to be courageous, because we won’t see everything the same
way. We will probably disagree
about some things and that will be uncomfortable. But perhaps we will also find that some of our dark and
shameful spaces are shared and common spaces, and that will let in some light.
If we can tolerate the discomfort, I bet we will learn
things from each other that will blow our minds and our worlds wide open. We won’t always find agreement, but we
can work on respect. I would like
to get really good at respect.
We will have to remind ourselves not to take it personally,
because we will probably trigger each other. I may say something and you might think, why would she say such a thing or what’s that supposed to mean? In that case, I hope you will ask why would you say that? or what do you mean? Maybe the answer will surprise
you. Maybe it won’t and you will
have to tell me how it feels to be on the other side of me when I say those
things. Hopefully I will be strong
enough to hear those things.
But let’s jump in and try. I’m a little scared, too, but let’s see what happens when we
use our lives as the canvases on which we answer the question: Who Do You Think You Are? Let’s revel in our truths and make this
life our masterpiece.
I’ll show you mine if you’ll show me yours.
